title: transparent
fandom: Weiss Kreuz
characters/pairings: Aya/Ken
rating: Teen
warnings: sex, insanity
summary: Ken thinks. (be afraid...)
notes: none

His body is long, lean, and hard, like his sword. He is the master of his weapon, and his body is toned as testament of that fact.

Ken can't watch as he moves above him. Sometimes, he makes Ken lie on his back, but usually Ken stays in this position, on his belly, his face in his pillow.

Ken is gnawing on the pillow, actually, and he's swallowed some of the filling, but the master above him hasn't noticed as he gyrates his hips in time with the pounding behind his ears.

Names. There are always so many names, names like masks that hide nothing. Ken doesn't understand them. Is it Ran who is touching him, or is it Aya who is pounding into him? Or is it someone else... Is this the job of Abyssinian, to rally his troops with morale-building fucking?

So many names.

Omi used to be Omi. But then he became a Takatori. Then he became Mamoru. Now he's Persia, though everyone pretends that he's not Persia, and that it's normal.

So many names. Ken doesn't understand. He digs his fingers into the mattress, and clamps his jaw down on the pillow. He likes having sex with whoever it is. He can trust himself here in this position. He wishes that Aya or Ran or whoever would let them stay like this, would just walk away from Persia and all the noise and tell him what to do. He could leave Weiss if he was following Ran. Or Aya. Or is it Abyssinian?

Names confuse him. There are no names when a man is dead. Or a woman. Or a child, even. Ken wonders why Persia never lets them kill the children. Start early, after all, prevention is better than a cure, right? There's a saying in that... Ken has heard it somewhere, but he's been to many places, and heard many things, and little of it made any sense.

He sees blood now, pouring down red over his eyes, and he tears the fabric of the pillow as he contains his screams of passion.

He doesn't know what name to scream.

His body is perfect. So lean and smooth. Ken likes his hair long, too, though he never lets Ken take it down. Ken's not sure why he grew his hair out, but it's probably another transparent mask.

What Ken can't see through, he can tear through. Everything bleeds red when cut. What protection can a mask offer?

Ken scoots away from him as he tries to settle in next to him. He pulls the pillow away, so he won't see it. Can't see it. Can't know. If he does, then he won't take Ken with him when he goes. He has to go, because he can't take orders from Omi, even if Omi is Persia and Aya is Ran, or is it Ran is Aya? Abyssinian?

Ken sits up. He's feeling restless already. He thinks about blood whenever he is touched. He wants to do it without any lube, but Aya or Ran or whoever won't let them. Aya knows best. Ran is the leader. Ken has to do what he's told.

Yohji wears masks, too. Yohji knows what Ken does with Ran, or Aya. Whoever is available. Yohji doesn't say anything. Yohji hides a lot inside of him. Ken has seen the girls that Yohji is done with; Ken knows what Yohji has done. He doesn't judge him. Sometimes, you want to kill at the most inopportune times. Ken sees that.

Omi got away. Omi was the purest of them. Omi never gave up believing in any of them. But Omi went to bed with Mamoru and woke up Persia. Now Persia spends his nights in the company of magpies and killers, and Omi is lost forever.

Except Omi is Persia. Omi didn't go away. It's just a name.

"Stay."

One word, so simple. Ken obeys, because he's been trained to. But he's restless, and he's thinking about blood.

"What will you say in your report to Persia? Will you tell him that you've contained the risk?"

He says nothing. He watches Ken with perfect eyes, and Ken feels dirty in their countenance.

"I was only doing my job. Hunters of the night. I was only killing who I was told." He shelters his body, raising his shoulder in protection from him. Ken doesn't want to see him seeing him.

He lifts himself up, and runs his hand down Ken's side. There is something calculating about the precision of the gesture, but Ken doesn't care. "It's all right."

Ken doesn't believe him, but he accepts the words anyway.

Words, like names, are transparent. They don't bleed, they don't save.

"Do you miss him?"

Ken's words are cutting. Ken likes to cut. But Aya's, or Ran's, defenses are strong. It isn't easy to make him bleed. Ken respects that. "Naturally."

Ken feels wounded by the effort of staying. He turns to face Aya, or Ran. He likes to think of him as Ran, as some innocent child with a normal life. Ken would have liked to have met him under those circumstances. Ken might have been able to cut him if his parents hadn't died. "Persia isn't doing his job."

Ran blinks, and looks away. Ken wants to slap him, to hear the sound of his flesh damaging Ran's flesh, but Aya wouldn't let him get close enough. "We have to trust Persia, Ken. Otherwise, we're all lost."

"Do you trust Persia?"

"With my life." Such conviction, so cheaply given away. Ran would die for anyone, if he could just be given the chance.

"What about Omi? Does Omi trust Persia?"

Ran didn't answer right away, and Ken becomes confused. Omi is Persia, so he doesn't have to trust him. But Omi is gone now, and Persia is left... and Mamoru took over, because he's a Takatori. But Omi is Mamoru...

"Omi does what he has to, Ken. So do we all. We have to rely on each other, because there's no one else we can trust." Ran speaks clearly, Ran speaks thoughtfully. Aya speaks with passion. Aya speaks with conviction. Cheap conviction, easy to buy... Kill a few men together, and suddenly there is trust?

Ken curls up on the bed. "I'm tired."

Aya stands up. Ran touches his cheek. "Get some sleep. I... I have to teach in the morning. Just... get some sleep."

Ken listens until Aya is gone. Until Ran is dressed and slipping out the door. He picks up the pillow from the floor, and slowly rips it into pieces. Aya would be back tomorrow. Ran would be back.

He isn't sure who it was who touched him, who it was that prepared him and put his fingers inside of him, but Ken wishes that he would come without the other. Ken wishes that he could be fucked raw 'til he bled.

He isn't like Omi. He doesn't want to be coddled into oblivion. He wants to scream and thrash into chaos.

He isn't like Persia. He can't take the lead. He would have to do whatever Aya or Ran told him to, so that when he left, he took him with. He doesn't want to see Aya go alone, doesn't want to be left behind by Ran.

He wishes he knew what name to scream when he was coming.








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