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DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME

By Clark Kent

Gotham-based billionaire Bruce Wayne made quite a splash at the Metropolitan Club's annual masquerade ball. Or rather, his date did.

Mr. Wayne arrived at the downtown Comorant Arms hotel with the winsome Ellery D'Ares on his arm. The flashbulbs were popping as Mr. Wayne emerged from his limo in the costume of Captain John D. Marcus from the 1960s hit "Space Trek." While Wayne cut a dashing figure, it was D'Ares who wowed the crowd, impressively made up as a green alien princess.

The daring Ellery shed even her trademark buzz cut, shaving her head to the skin to pull off the effect. Her skin was entirely colored green; a notable feat given the little coverage her costume provided.

Unfortunately, the party organizers failed to warn Mr. Wayne and Miss D'Ares that a Space Trek convention was being held at the Skyway Suites across the street. Several conventioneers, believing Wayne and D'Ares were heading to the wrong location, sought to redirect the couple, running afoul of their bodyguards.

No one on site was able to give a clear account of what happened when the police arrived, but in the course of the melee, it seems Mr. Wayne was unable to adequately shield Miss D'Ares from the disruptive throng. The lady found herself dunked in the fountain in front of the Comorant Arms - an event which also tragically revealed the relatively permanent nature of the dye with which she had colored her skin.

Miss D'Ares was visibly upset as she was taken home by her bodyguard. Mr. Wayne departed the party soon afterwards, leaving a clear impression that Ellery has lost her place on his dance card.

-30-

(30/30 fic by Chicago, Disclaimers in "Opening Credits".)

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